Well FaceBook is playing another game where users have to send to another user a number and the user will post how they feel about the other person as their staus message... so far this is what i got about myself....

‎#418---you scare me in a "good" way. lol Those stress relievers are sooooooooo needed and appreciated like no other. super sweet and cool in my book for life

‎#418 you are funny and wild as hell

#418... wanted to kiss them lips, ravage that body ... & lick ur tattoo ever since the loft..!!!

#777: so its hard for me to articulate what i really want to say about you, your funny sweet, and I love spending time with you. You're an amazing person inside and out and I can't wait to see you again ♥..oh and i like molesting you too.

#418 cool person... hold on... you work with me.... get back to work.................

and our feelings...

Well I was talking to a close friend today and he asked me why I haven't settled down. When I told him that I haven't found the right guy, he got kind of upset. He actually said that I was slipping, and that is not how he remembers me from years ago.
Rejection is still a big issue with me, and it will always will be. Yeah, back in the day I was a lot more brash. Now I am reserved and a little bit more cautious with affairs of the heart. You can say that a woman can only get her heart broken but so many times before she puts it in that box and bury it under the Vatican. All I could say to him is when that man sees this diamond in the rough, he will have something more precious than anything man can create.

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This Masquerade

I live behind this mask, concealing my emotions as I move through the rigors of life. People come, people go, and yet my mask remains the same. My mask is always smiling, always happy when greeted. Behind the mask lies the pain of heartbreak, unable to express what she truly is and what she desires, for the sake of another or others, for they may not understand.

I am constantly evolving to learn when to hide my real being and when to come from behind the mask. I am not be perfect, but I am human. As the song goes, "we're lost in this masquerade". I shouldn't, but I must.

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Yeah... the IceWoman Cometh (again)

So, this guy that I have dismissed not once, but three times already decides he wants to try his luck yet again. This is the same guy that told me that I need "a baller in my life" a while ago because he was too cheap to take me out to dinner... and he asked me where I wanted to go!

So now, I am chatting with him on FaceBook and he still wants to see me.. *scratching head* ... I REALLY don't know what he was thinking about coming that route with me again after the last time. Yeap, I did cuss him out. Maybe its me and my old-fashioned upbringing... I will let you be the judge for yourself. Below is a copy of the FaceBook email that we exchanged. I will use his initials only for not putting him on full blast.

L J October 23 at 1:03pm Report
hey wussup how u been? good I hope

Adrian Spruill October 23 at 7:55pm
I am super thanks for asking.. how have u been?
Sent via Facebook Mobile

LJ October 25 at 10:45am Report
good still tryin to see you

Adrian Spruill October 25 at 3:17pm
Oh really? I still have the Yahoo chat in which you told me "I need a baller in my life".

L J October 25 at 8:27pm Report
becaus eu are spoiled
(side note: I will forgive you for not using spell check, but he lit the fuse to the dynamite with the word spoiled)

Adrian Spruill October 25 at 8:29pm
I cannot help the fact that every guy that I dated was a gentleman, knew how to treat me, and spoiled me.

L J October 26 at 4:10pm Report
see nobody is supposed to be spoiled that's the problem these days everybody lookin for a free ride
(side note... and boom goes the dynamite...)

Adrian Spruill October 26 at 5:08pm
who said a free ride???? Let me be perfectly clear....
I was taught by the men in my life (father, uncles, older cousins) that if a guy is interested in a woman that they are going to treat her right. When a man asks a woman out, he is going to take her out, on his dime, to show her that he is interested in her.

Now....
When you asked me for a date to go out, I told you that a dinner and a movie is a very basic date. You actually became appalled at the fact that is what I wanted to do. You stated that you wanted to go to the pool hall, get some hot wings and a pitcher of beer and chill out, AFTER you said that I need a baller in my life. That is something that I do with my friends when we want to relax after a hard day at work. If we have been dating for a time, then it is all good that we do that.

Now here is some food for thought. Everyone, including myself, likes to be spoiled every once in a while. Being spoiled does not equal to a "free ride". Spoiling your woman can be a simple as:
- sending her a text message saying I miss you.
- romantic car ride down Route 29 to a winery.
- going to her favorite museum on the mall
- surprising her with flowers
- rubbing her feet after a log day of work
- cook her favorite meal, or any meal for that matter
If you know how to spoil your woman, then she will know that she is appreciated by you.

Was I too harsh?? In my mind, nah.....

damn... monday again...

I finished another Monday in my pursuit of Fridays. But my weekend was really fun! I wnt to my women's networking function, then hung out with some others over on U street. I realized that I need to revisit the U Street corridor. It has really been overhauled and it is actually a destination in DC. Now I have to check out Twins Jazz and a couple of places there, as well as go get a half-smoke from Ben's Chili Bowl (yum).

Then I went and checked out Arena Stage. I was spellbound. The last time I was in the there, I went to see Joe Turner Come and Gone. I'm kinda upset that I didn't bring my 35mm to take pictures, but it will be a great destination for theatre in DC.

So now I am on my way to my humble abode. As I cross the Potomac into DC, I will allow my mind to wander.

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another week almost over

Its about to be Friday in under an hour, and im watching replays of Law and Order CI in bed. The people above me dont know the definiton of "go to fucking sleep and stop throwing shyt!!"

One person asked me today do I believe in ghosts. I told them that I have believed in ghosts since I was small. Then the question became "can you see them?". I smiled and didnt answer the question, knowing that my actual answer can either intrigued the person more or freak them out. So I keep my mouth shut and know what my limitations are. Sometimes people cannot handle what is not tangible.

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Aries horoscope for today

--
Copyright (c) DailyHoroscope.
Download it now -- http://bit.ly/DHmobile'>Aries horoscope for Oct 20 2010 by DailyHoroscope (http://bit.ly/DHmobile)

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Things to do with your woman!

Ok, I will admit that I am somewhat of a Facebook whore (LOL), but I have to post this guys' list of things to do with your woman. Thank you, Bryant Stokes, for informing women that chivalry and spontaneity is not dead.

Fellas, take heed to this list if you want to really impress your woman, including yours truly!

Things to Do with Ur Women Gentlemen..
Make your own video Karaoke. See a musical. Go to a concert. Go out for a cultural dinner. Visit a childrens' hospital. Go to the symphony. Visit each others grandparents. Volunteer together. Go camping. Go horseback riding. Go miniature golfing. Go whitewater rafting. Go dancing. Rake leaves & play in them. Play a game of tag.

Visit the zoo. See an aquarium. Go to a play. Visit an art gallery. Play board games. Go to a drive-in movie. Go to a car show. Go see fireworks. Go to a movie. Go to an ice skating show. Go to a concert. Visit garage sales. Go to an air show. Play card games.

Pick colorful fall leaves• Go for a moonlit walk• Watch TV together• Decorate a Christmas tree• Feed ducks at a pond• Go on a hay ride• Snuggle• Carve a jack-o-lantern• Watch the sunrise• Go shell searching on the beach• Visit an orchard• Watch little league games• Watch planes take off• See a midnight movie• Go to a wedding together

Look for 4-leaf clovers• Fruit tree picking /orchard• Go window shopping• Read tabloids & laugh together• Thumb wrestle• Puddle jump in the rain• Play tennis• Play volleyball• Hot air balloon ride• Ride a bike built for two• Go water-skiing• Go sailing• Go to a playground...• Go to the horse races• Go to an amusement park•

Do laundry together• Make ice cream• Go for a sunset walk• Cook dinner for each other• Go grocery shopping• Build ice cream sundaes• Color in coloring books• Go to an arcade• Visit a city that is the name of a state• Take a sleigh ride• Go snowmobiling• Play Frisbee• Park and star watch• Visit a pet store• Rent a limo for the evening

Build a snowman• Make snow angels• Sunbathe together• Run together in the rain• Play racquetball• Badminton• Ride go-carts• Beach volleyball• Catch fire flies• Snowball fights• Go for a country drive• Go stargazing• Rent a movie• Have a picnic at home• Look at Christmas lights• Go to a museum• Watch the sunset• Bake cookies together

Hopscotch• Climb trees together• Take a riverboat cruise• Play broomball• Play kick the can• Ride a ferry or steamboat• Waterslide• Go swimming• Go moped riding• Go to the driving range• Play touch football• Jet ski• Go sledding• Work out together

Places to Kiss Your Lover Gentlemen
Behind their ear.• Tip of their nose.• Back of their neck.• Underside of their forearm.• Curve of their waist.• Palm of their hand.• Inside their wrist.• Under their chin.• Their eyelids.• Inside of their ankle.• Their collar bone.• Tips of their fingers.• Their spine.• Small of their back.• Their tummy.• Behind their knees.• There Inner & Outer Thighs.• There Toes & Feet.• There Butt.• There Breasts & Nipples.• Of course, this is just to give you an idea. Aim to shower your love with kisses ALL OVER!

another week....

Well its the start of another workweek for me. In foresight, I am looking forward to the future. I have my official launch party coming up, a couple of photo shoots, and other parties lined up.

In hindsight, I am really behind schedule. On my life's schedule, I had planned on being my own boss and generating my own revenue. But life throws curve balls in your direction. I have slowed down, taking my time and thinking everything through before making decisions.

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other side of the world of love and support

I was listening to the song "Other Side of the World" by Luther Vandross last night on my way home from my kick-ass, full of jerk ckicken and alchohol, Hedo II vacation Before I realized it, tears was coming to my eyes.

I now know that I am blessed and cursed. I knew then that I will never find someone that knows what true love is really all about. I am that fallen angel that get everyone else hooked up and happy in love, but I am cursed that love will elude me for all enternity. Cupid will always be my enemy, and it is what it is. I swallow a bitter pill and swallow everything that comes along with it.

With that being said, I would like to say congrats to Ed OSM and Carlos SpicyWeiner on their journey into that road of life called love. They deserve my friendship and support in this endeavor, and that will not cease.

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wednesday

Its hump day ladies and gentlemen. It is the day where u get over the hump and look toward the light at the end of the tunnel called the weekend.

For me, its just another day.

I'm trying to get out this funk that I feel right now. My life is... how can I put it... a hot ghetto mess. Don't get me wrong, I am truly grateful for what I have- a job, a healthy son, a roof over my head and food on my table. I am taking a walk out on faith with my company. Already I am met with resistance. People are already telling me that I am going to fail, and the ones that I thought would be my rock is becoming quicksand. However I will press on. I have a deadline of April 18, 2011 to make it happen.

As for love, (in my Nino Brown voice) f**k that n****r! Thanks to cupid's stupid ass, he shot me and not the other person. If anybody see that little fucker, tell him that he needs to stay with Jimmy Hoffa or else he will be another missing person on a milk carton. (I was trying to keep it PG, but its hard when you are frustrated).

On a more ligher note, in 1 week I will be on the beaches of Jamaica sipping on a really strong fruity drink trying to be like Stella and get my groove back.

Smooches!!

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Monday blahs

yeah its another dreary day in the DMV. I'm in some sort of mood today, but I can't quite place my finger on it. I should be grinning from ear to ear, but I'm not.

I have been doing a lot of soul searching these few days. I found myself wondering how I can allow someone to capture my heart. Then as soon as I take that step of faith, I fall like a rock into a pond. I know what Stevie Wonder is talking about in the song "Rocket Love":
"..you took me riding in your rocket and gave me a star, but at a half a mile from heaven you dropped me back down to this cold, cold world."

Now I have waved my flag of defeat, kicked Cupid's ass for setting my heart up for failure, and have went back into my rabbit hole.

Melancholy is the word of the day.

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iPod gone... but I must carry on..

Yeah, after giving me 5 good years of service, my ipod decided to end her life all on her own this morning. I'm sitting here with my Ciroc singing 'the thrill is gone'. *drowning in my sorrow*

On to the next thing...

I am going to take that giant leap forward and start my other business full time. So I am looking forward to actually have a launch party for that, and then set up a stand to sell some of my photo prints over at Eastern Market. Some will be still life, others will be digital images that I have created and taken around the DC area. There will also be some more significant prints available. I will have a partial list up really soon.

Now I am going to head off to bed now. I am going to dedicate the weekend to revamping my apartment into a more functional space.

Smooches,

Adrian

Yay.. oops....

Well I found out recently that my oldest sister will be holding the flag for the Susan G. Komen Race for the cure in Tampa, FL. I am sooo proud of her and what she has accomplished. Right now I am thinking of ways to rob Peter and pay Paul so that I can be with my sister for this event.

In all of this excitement, I inadvertently (ok ... I wasn't paying full attention to what I was doing when I was multitasking..updating the site, on the house line and cell phone on a "3 way call") put the official launch date of my event company as the same weekend that I was going to be in Tampa. Oops, my bad....

Well, back to the drawing board....

Another Wednesday... Just a Step Closer...

Yes, I am still on my daily grind ladies and gentlemen.

I have the official website for 1Angel 2Demons Events up and running... somewhat. The front page is one of my pet projects. Check out my blog at http://1angel2demons.blogspot.com. come check me out and the brainstorming ideas that I have for upcoming events.

Also keep your eyes and ears open for my launch party for both 1A2D and ThundaGraphics. There will be prints available for purchase at the event.

Well let me go back into the batcave and finish up the other half of the site.

Love ya all....

looking toward the future...

well I know that I have not blogged in a minute, but I'm still lurking around. I have so much on my plate these days. Planning a wedding is a little bit of work, but at the same time I am looking forward to the fruits of my labor.

I am also working out the details in doing a poetry night here in the area. So the details will be listed soon enough.

Well its time for me to go and write a little bit in my journal.

Fantasia, Fantasia....

dammit woman!!
There are soooo many things wrong with your situation that it calls for a cleaning house session. Instead of going through everything and everyone that had failed in this situation, I am simply going to nod and hope that you get better soon.

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Damaged--- Work in Progrss

Damaged

I am damaged

Scars from years of abuse still linger

Around my broken heart

I am incapable of loving another

Until my scars heal

My heart will heal from the heartache of love

I bury myself in all other aspects of life

Work, family, school

To escape the pain, the hurt, the anger

Of a broken heart and a wounded soul

I don’t believe in fairy tales

No knight in shining armor

Kings like that only exists

Between the covers of a book

Is it wrong? Maybe …

So I wait patiently

For a man that will prove to me

That fairytales can be real and exists

Wounds will bind my heart

And heal my soul

He will be my knight, my king

As I will stand beside him as his queen

Breaking free of my bonds

That holds my soul

Another Day in the Life..

Ahhh here its Friday. Looking forward to another fun-filled weekend here in the DMV. Yes, I'm still single. Some people look it as an unfortunate turn of events, and that any man lucky enough to catch me will want to hold on to me. However I look at it as that curse that will not be erased anytime soon. I have to be comfortable with that notion or else I would be in therapy holding a teddy bear crying in the corner.

Oh well....

This unforgiving time-out in my love life gave me the spark to write again... and did it ever!!!!. My teacher told me years ago that my writings speak of the pain that I have felt in the past, and can be a catalyst for the future. Back then, I thought it was pure BS, but then I'm starting to believe it.

I will be posting it on here and Facebook... hope u like it....

Its been over 4 months since I have blogged anything??? Damn!

Well I am going to try to start blogging at least once a week so that I can get back into the swing of things.

Right now I have soo much on my plate right now. I am currently working on my certification for event planning and wedding services in the DC area. I am still pinching myself on my hands for that one. I would never think in my wildest dreams that I would be doing wedding planning. Those are the most difficult to shoot, and I am sometimes at my wits' end just to make sure I don't maim someone in the process. I have my email address (1angel2demons@gmail.com) already set up for events and now I need to get the site up and running.

Not only that headache, I submitted a couple of prints to show off some of my prints at an art show sponsored by Tanya Blount as a part of her birthday celebration. She will be showcasing local talent in the show. I am really excited to put some of my prints out for public viewing.

I think I got my writers' block out of the way of sorts. I have been slowly but surely cranking out the poems and short journal entries. Its been going on for far too long, and I want that flow to come back to me. So be looking out for me to post some things here and on Facebook.

That is all the catching up that I can to do for the moment. Now I have to go and become the ATM for my son.

Love sees color now?

Well I was informed recently though an associate that a guy that I was cool with (and was sexing on a regular basis) wanted to date me. While everything was on the up and up, he states that the only reason why he can't date me was because of the complexion that I have. It seems that he favors caramel skin over dark chocolate.

*record scratch* WHAT IN THE FOUR SIDES OF HELL OF AN EXCUSE IS THIS??? IS A NEGRO THAT DAMN CLOSED MINDED THESE DAYS TO BE HUNG UP OVER COLOR???

I kept my cool when I found this out, even laughed about it with a couple of friends. In the back of my mind, all I kept asking was this one question: If I am not dating material, why do you continue to keep screwing me? Ooh that's right - all 'kitties' are still pink. So as long as the kitty stays pink he will continue to keep coming back. Sorry er'hole, the gate is closed.

Yes, I am dark-skinned. Hell my father was black like charcoal and my mom is caramel. I was taught that love sees no color because you went by the person's personality and how that person made you feel when you are around them. I am glad that I did not develop any major feeling towards him or else it would have been really ugly.

Singleness Complete

It took 2 snowstorms and a move to a new apartment to make me realize that I was already in my single comfort zone.

The Peanut Gallery completely left me alone. I can count on one hand how many times either person from the crew called me. The funny part is that I wasn't expecting them to call me, text me, or even send up a smoke signal. When I moved, all ties were severed. The good times are gone. No more accusations of 'unofficial boyfirends', breaking in doors, or anything else for that matter.

My mind is clear. I am slowly to start writing again and being creative. I am even in the process of building the foundation of my five year plan of running my own Trapeze-style club. Hopefully by the end of the year I can start looking for a nice private spot and for investors and silent partners for this enterprise.

The kryptonite to a single person - love and emotions. Don't get me wrong, sometimes I yearn to be held and to be loved by the right person. At the moment, that is definitely not in the stars for me. I feel like Vivian Green when she says "I'm tired of love". I don't have the time or the energy to figure out love and emotions with anyone else, including myself. Maybe in the future, when the alighment of the stars and the planets are just right, the total eclipse of the heart will occur, and love will be my friend again.

I hate stupid people!

Since the government was closed all week, I decided to finish up my packing so that I can move on Saturday. Of course with all of the other people snowed in, getting cabin fever, My Facebook page started getting random people asking me to be their friend. Why sure, I will be your friend because I like to meet new and interesting people and network all the while. Needles to say, while I am doing all of this, I am packing to move to a new apartment, trying not to kill the cat, clearing off the snow off my patio, and trying not to get cabin fever.

Well I befriended one little chap and we started talking on Facebook, then went over to Yahoo IM. To sum it up, he was looking for a woman to love. I will never knock that, but he kept constantly asking me if I will give him a chance. Can you say Red Flag in 4 languages??? The second red flag is that he is in the mountains of VA, a good 4+ hours away. Can you say that the mountain is already stacked against him? Yeah, it really is.

Well he gave me his number and told me to call him after I was done taking my shower last night. I went through my phone and resonded to all the FB texts that I received, and, while running a couple of repair programs, I drifted off to sleep. I was awakened by the beeping of my PC. I had just enough strength to get up and turn off the lamp and put my laptop on the table. As I am putting the laptop down, I get a Facebook message talking about how much of a fake person that I am. Because I didn't call you??? Please!!!

Now I am getting hate-filled Yahoo messages that I am such a fake bitch and that I need to keep it real, because I was accepting friend requests and responding to FB notifications, and not idle on Yahoo last night. I couldn't help but laugh. As I put his retarded ass in the Ignore bin, I told him very nicely that all Facebook messages come to my phone, and there are delays in the postings from a phone, dumbass.

Snowed in...

Well the snow has stopped falling in the DMV. I have about 20" on my freaking patio!! Soo not cool man! Now I have to get up tomorrow morning and try to make a path out to the sidewalk first (like I can SEE a sidewalk) and then out to the path that they have made into a driveway. People have been digging their cars out and trying to drive down the path in my apartment complex. Some have succeeded, others haven't.

The funniest thing I have seen so far today is the little kid trying to walk in the snow. He was trying to walk across the snow drift, took a step forward, and fell face first into a deep section of snow. I haven't seen that little boy since. I hope someone came and rescued his little butt.

As for now, I sit here, drinking my hot cocoa trying to watch movies all night. I guess I will go ahead and turn in for the night and then try to finish packing the rest of my belongings for my move prior to the big game. GO NEW ORLEANS!!

Brain Damaged

(Repost)

The other day I realize my friends are all brain damaged. All because I feel like doing my own thing. They do not realize I need the space to regain creative control of that part of me that makes me special and unique. I would like to become more comfortable with my single status in society. Lacking these things that makes me special tears me up inside. So yes, I will be making that change to become better, stronger, and more of the woman that I will be.

I have a five (5) year plan, and this change is what I need to get on the right track. Just stay in my corner and we will be fine.

Peanut Gallery Now Taking Applications

The peanut gallery (in which I refer to as my friends) is acting a fool big time, so I need to start systematically adding to the craziness roster so I can have an additional outlet of looking like one of the guys from that Gamefly commercial on a daily basis. Below is a list of qualifications:

- must be funny

- be a professional lush (no alcholholicks allowed..yeah I spelled it wrong for a reason)

- must love drama in their lives so I can have something to listen to and give my personal opinion

- know not to bring drama to my doorstep.. you will feel my wrath!

- know how to have a good time no matter what the circumstances are

- be willing to travel with the rest of the peanut gallery twice a year for our "waiting to exhale" conventions

- must be comfortable about telling your life stories to other people

- must know something about sex, politics, world affairs, sports, and the media (well not really about the politics, world affairs, sports, and the media portion, but it sounded good)

- if you are a swinger, be prepared to be thrown under the bus just for humor's sake :)

Please forward your resume via email or Facebook and explain why you should be part of the Peanut Gallery.

Ahh Friends

Today I realize my friends are all brain damaged. All because I feel like doing my own thing. They do not realize I need the space to regain creative control of that part of me that makes me special and unique. I would like to become more comfortable with my single status in society. Lacking these things that makes me special tears me up inside. So yes, I will be making that change to become better, stronger, and more of the woman that I will be.

I have a five (5) year plan, and this change is what I need to get on the right track. Just stay in my corner and we will be fine.

ASL anyone???

No I am not talking about age/sex/location crap. I am referring to American Sign Language (ASL).

On my way to work, I saw a young lady who looks a little lost at the Metro station. Being friendly, I asked her if she was lost. She immediately started signing as fast as she could. I haven't used sign language in years (background: I have cousins that are deaf, and I am hearing impaired), and I had to tell her to slow down. She finally asked where is the Hoffman Building in proximity to the train station. I pointed her in the right direction. She appeared really grateful and relieved. She thanked me immensely and went on about her way.

I walked the opposite direction feeling really good about myself, but in the back of my mind I wondered how long she had been standing there looking or trying to ask for help, and no one answered.

when the smoke clears...

As I am looking through my poetry that I have written over the years, I see a pattern emerging. When all is well within the confines of my little world, I am able to write about anything that comes to mind, and drew images as well. If I had an issue in the love department, that came out in poem, but no visual pictures. Those times I was stressed beyond imagination, nothing comes to me. My creative mind just simply shuts down and waits for the chaos to move on. This also goes for my photography.

Hopefully when the smoke clears, I can start doing what I love most about myself - being creative on paper and behind the camera.

(Damn I need some peace and solace.)

2010.. A New Year...

Well the new decade is only 18 days old, and already people wants to stress me the hell out. I have an agenda this year, and I will a cut a brother or a sister out my life if you want to cause me grief. I'm just getting over my writers block. woo hoo!! Now I have started to crank out some of my poetry once again. I threw my first DC swing party Halloween night. It was off the chain, and is looking forward throwing another one with the demons.

I am still not comfortable in my singleness. A sister gets tired of running into Mr. Right Now. All Mr. Right Now can do is stroke the kitty and get out, if that. Are all of the men that I run into just that insecure to deal with me?? Am I too damn independent?? Or is it that men just don't want to put in the work for a solid, stable relationship? Oh I get it.. I just keep it too real for the man to comprehend.