2011....new year, same haters

Well 2011 is already off to a good start. I have connected with childhood friends, made connections, reminding myself that there is someone out there that deserves my time and attention, and is creating a foundation for my new career.

Why is the same damn bitches that hated me in 2010 is STILL hating on me in the new year??? I mean really, can y'all concentrate on somebody else? Then again, you are my biggest fans. You are the only ones that seem to keep my name in your mouth. I have never said a bad thing about you, welcomed you into my house, allowed you to get lifted, gave you money when you needed it, and yet I am the scum of the earth. You won't talk about that, will you? In the end, I treated you like a human and you took that as sign of weakness.

This year, while I am still doing me, still making connections, still going about my business, I am going to be the better woman. I will still stay hello, I will still invite you over for drinks, and still treat you like a human. Go runtellthat!!!

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Well FaceBook is playing another game where users have to send to another user a number and the user will post how they feel about the other person as their staus message... so far this is what i got about myself....

‎#418---you scare me in a "good" way. lol Those stress relievers are sooooooooo needed and appreciated like no other. super sweet and cool in my book for life

‎#418 you are funny and wild as hell

#418... wanted to kiss them lips, ravage that body ... & lick ur tattoo ever since the loft..!!!

#777: so its hard for me to articulate what i really want to say about you, your funny sweet, and I love spending time with you. You're an amazing person inside and out and I can't wait to see you again ♥..oh and i like molesting you too.

#418 cool person... hold on... you work with me.... get back to work.................

and our feelings...

Well I was talking to a close friend today and he asked me why I haven't settled down. When I told him that I haven't found the right guy, he got kind of upset. He actually said that I was slipping, and that is not how he remembers me from years ago.
Rejection is still a big issue with me, and it will always will be. Yeah, back in the day I was a lot more brash. Now I am reserved and a little bit more cautious with affairs of the heart. You can say that a woman can only get her heart broken but so many times before she puts it in that box and bury it under the Vatican. All I could say to him is when that man sees this diamond in the rough, he will have something more precious than anything man can create.

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This Masquerade

I live behind this mask, concealing my emotions as I move through the rigors of life. People come, people go, and yet my mask remains the same. My mask is always smiling, always happy when greeted. Behind the mask lies the pain of heartbreak, unable to express what she truly is and what she desires, for the sake of another or others, for they may not understand.

I am constantly evolving to learn when to hide my real being and when to come from behind the mask. I am not be perfect, but I am human. As the song goes, "we're lost in this masquerade". I shouldn't, but I must.

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Yeah... the IceWoman Cometh (again)

So, this guy that I have dismissed not once, but three times already decides he wants to try his luck yet again. This is the same guy that told me that I need "a baller in my life" a while ago because he was too cheap to take me out to dinner... and he asked me where I wanted to go!

So now, I am chatting with him on FaceBook and he still wants to see me.. *scratching head* ... I REALLY don't know what he was thinking about coming that route with me again after the last time. Yeap, I did cuss him out. Maybe its me and my old-fashioned upbringing... I will let you be the judge for yourself. Below is a copy of the FaceBook email that we exchanged. I will use his initials only for not putting him on full blast.

L J October 23 at 1:03pm Report
hey wussup how u been? good I hope

Adrian Spruill October 23 at 7:55pm
I am super thanks for asking.. how have u been?
Sent via Facebook Mobile

LJ October 25 at 10:45am Report
good still tryin to see you

Adrian Spruill October 25 at 3:17pm
Oh really? I still have the Yahoo chat in which you told me "I need a baller in my life".

L J October 25 at 8:27pm Report
becaus eu are spoiled
(side note: I will forgive you for not using spell check, but he lit the fuse to the dynamite with the word spoiled)

Adrian Spruill October 25 at 8:29pm
I cannot help the fact that every guy that I dated was a gentleman, knew how to treat me, and spoiled me.

L J October 26 at 4:10pm Report
see nobody is supposed to be spoiled that's the problem these days everybody lookin for a free ride
(side note... and boom goes the dynamite...)

Adrian Spruill October 26 at 5:08pm
who said a free ride???? Let me be perfectly clear....
I was taught by the men in my life (father, uncles, older cousins) that if a guy is interested in a woman that they are going to treat her right. When a man asks a woman out, he is going to take her out, on his dime, to show her that he is interested in her.

Now....
When you asked me for a date to go out, I told you that a dinner and a movie is a very basic date. You actually became appalled at the fact that is what I wanted to do. You stated that you wanted to go to the pool hall, get some hot wings and a pitcher of beer and chill out, AFTER you said that I need a baller in my life. That is something that I do with my friends when we want to relax after a hard day at work. If we have been dating for a time, then it is all good that we do that.

Now here is some food for thought. Everyone, including myself, likes to be spoiled every once in a while. Being spoiled does not equal to a "free ride". Spoiling your woman can be a simple as:
- sending her a text message saying I miss you.
- romantic car ride down Route 29 to a winery.
- going to her favorite museum on the mall
- surprising her with flowers
- rubbing her feet after a log day of work
- cook her favorite meal, or any meal for that matter
If you know how to spoil your woman, then she will know that she is appreciated by you.

Was I too harsh?? In my mind, nah.....

damn... monday again...

I finished another Monday in my pursuit of Fridays. But my weekend was really fun! I wnt to my women's networking function, then hung out with some others over on U street. I realized that I need to revisit the U Street corridor. It has really been overhauled and it is actually a destination in DC. Now I have to check out Twins Jazz and a couple of places there, as well as go get a half-smoke from Ben's Chili Bowl (yum).

Then I went and checked out Arena Stage. I was spellbound. The last time I was in the there, I went to see Joe Turner Come and Gone. I'm kinda upset that I didn't bring my 35mm to take pictures, but it will be a great destination for theatre in DC.

So now I am on my way to my humble abode. As I cross the Potomac into DC, I will allow my mind to wander.

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another week almost over

Its about to be Friday in under an hour, and im watching replays of Law and Order CI in bed. The people above me dont know the definiton of "go to fucking sleep and stop throwing shyt!!"

One person asked me today do I believe in ghosts. I told them that I have believed in ghosts since I was small. Then the question became "can you see them?". I smiled and didnt answer the question, knowing that my actual answer can either intrigued the person more or freak them out. So I keep my mouth shut and know what my limitations are. Sometimes people cannot handle what is not tangible.

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